Week Fifteen: Bringing Self-Love to Body Awareness

We’ve explored a number of experiments around the theme of mindfulness. For this week, I’d like to invite you to pay particular attention to the sensations that arise and move through your body. One of the things we learn growing up, if we are frightened or hurt, is to move our attention out of our bodies rather than moving into an even more immediate awareness of the ever-changing variety of sensations and body states that arise moment to moment. In the same way as thoughts and feelings continue to move on through when we make room for them – without pushing them away or grabbing onto them – the sensations in our bodies are similar. They come and go all the time, and we can enhance a sense of well-being and groundedness when we learn to honor our bodies with our attention.

In my personal journey, being aware of physical sensations has consistently been a great gift. I’ve learned to move from anxiety into stillness through a mindful process of ceasing to struggle with discomfort, knowing that I will inevitably return to comfort if I just allow my body to move through whatever I experience. I’ve also had the benefit of having friends who have taught me to become aware of an internal dialogue in which I would “catastrophize” discomfort and pain. I hadn’t consciously realized that I was carrying on this dialogue about how things were going to get worse, or I couldn’t stand it, or whatever it may have been I was telling myself. Finding that I was saying some of these thoughts out loud, and learning to identify and turn off this dialogue, was another opportunity to enhance mindfulness. And, learning to be spacious and open, softening around discomfort, allowed me to discover that I would eventually return to the stillness.

For this week’s experiment, see what happens if you allow yourself to sit quietly and just to notice what’s happening in your body. When you discover an area of comfort, just enjoy it. There’s nothing to do “with” the sensations, no place you need to take them. Just allow some time to experience and savor them.

Then, when an area of discomfort arises, just notice that without having to do anything at all to push away or change those sensations. Give them your spacious attention and then, when you feel you’d like to do so, invite your awareness to return to the comfort you felt before. There’s nothing else to do with the experiment. There’s just an opportunity to be aware without fending off or having to change what you notice.

If you have an experience of chronic pain, or discomfort that doesn’t arise and move through, notice what happens when you “soften” around it and allow it to be what is for now. Also notice any internal dialogue you may have around physical discomfort. As with any mindfulness practice, simply name it as a thought and allow it to move through without having to develop it, push it away, or engage it in any way.

Then, if you can access feelings of self-love, self-acceptance, self-respect – any kind of love for yourself – notice how you experience these feelings in your body. There’s nothing to do with these sensations – just be aware of them. Because of the prohibitions so many of us learned against self-love, you may notice that mixed feelings arise as you sit with the sensations generated by caring about yourself. If this happens, just notice those sensations – give them all the room they need just to arise and move through your experience – and then return to the possibility of experiencing the sensations of self-love in your body.

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