There’s a principle in the Somatic Experiencing® approach for treating trauma that has to do with not adding more energy to an already-overwhelmed nervous system and psyche in people who have experienced physical or emotional trauma.  It’s a principle that conveys a deep wisdom – one that we can use to explore our own capacity to re-center and ground ourselves when we’re confronted with activating, upsetting experiences.

For example, when something happens that causes us stress or distress, our response to the event is affected by the subsequent thoughts and other reactions we have to our initial experience.  If we generate negative thoughts about it, or fuel overwhelming emotions with a review of all the bad things that have happened to us, or the injustices that led to the overwhelming experience, we add energy to our already-overloaded psyche and body. 

If, on the other hand, we notice our reaction mindfully, becoming aware of it without clinging to it or attempting to push it away, we can more skillfully allow activating responses to emerge and then move through without adding more energy to them.  When we can do this, whatever arises in our thoughts, feelings, and sensations has the room it needs to move into our immediate awareness and then on through.

For this week’s experiment, I invite you to explore the ways in which you add energy to the challenges and distress you may encounter along the way.  For example, if you get caught in a traffic jam, notice your responses.  Do you have thoughts that add to your stress?  Do you become physically tense and tight?  Do you fuel irritation by telling yourself that this shouldn’t be happening to you?  If you fall and hurt yourself, do you start into a round of self-criticism or blame against yourself or someone else?  If you feel angry or sad during distress, do you allow yourself to notice those feelings without magnifying them, or do you feed yourself negative thoughts that actually increase the feelings?

When you become aware of adding energy to your distress in this way, notice what happens if you stop whatever thoughts may increase your distress.  As you experience your distress without adding anything to it, notice what happens.  The process is similar to a mindfulness meditation, where you become aware of what’s moving through your experience without doing anything with or to it.  It’s just the next awareness arising.

Most of us have a habit of spontaneously adding to our distress, without realizing we’re doing so.  As you work with this experiment, you may discover that challenging experiences don’t cause quite as much suffering when you allow them to just be what they are without adding in upsetting thoughts or reactions.  It doesn’t mean these thoughts or reactions won’t emerge spontaneously.  The key is to notice them and let them go, not to jump on board with them.  While we can’t control what comes our way, we can be more skillful about how we move through the difficulties that enter our lives.

As with all the experiments, there’s no right way to do this one.  There’s just this next opportunity to practice being mindfully present to your experience and to notice the powerful impact of not adding more energy to upsetting experiences.